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  • Posted on June 17, 2011 at 9:22 pm

“Sing to God, sing praises to his name; lift up a song to him who rides through the deserts;his name is the LORD; exult before him! Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation.” (Psalm 68:4-5)

The palmist worships the Lord for riding through the deserts, for being present in the lonely, dry, lifeless places often symbolically associated with not sensing God’s presence and running dry on the river of life that flows from the Lord, who else where promises us rivers in the desert. We are encouraged to exult before him who is there even when we are dry, dead, and barren, lonely and forsaken. In similar images, God is presented as taking up into his personal care those without the nurture and guidance, without the  love and protection, of a father and a husband. A greater principle behind his care for widows and orphans is that he defends the defenseless and the destitute of the land from injustice.

This does not relieve the Church one iota. All the more, we are his body, we are called to take care of the widow and the fatherless and love them and care for them as much as we would our own. Does that mean everyone has to adopt a child or a grandma into their family? No, we each have our own call and ministry, but we do need to have listening ears willing to hear his call and open hearts with the courage to say yes to him in regards to whatever ministry and function of his body he does call us to.

Lord, we thank you for your personal care and touch on those who do not have a loving, compassionate father in their lives. We ask you today to show us who the “widows and orphans” are in our communities, those defenseless and destitute (of mind, heart, or pocketbook) and unable to stand up for themselves. Show us in particular those specific people, or areas, in which you have called us to help, and further, how you would have us to do so. Equip us and strengthen and embolden us to step out and allow you to defend them through us in whatever way yo. In Jesus’ name we pray, amen.

Studying Father God’s Parenting Example

  • Posted on June 16, 2011 at 1:22 pm

“As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him.” (Psalm 103:13)

Sadly, some of us can’t relate to this verse. Our fathers weren’t compassionate, and we certainly didn’t associate the fear our fathers produced leading to him being gentle, kind, and loving toward us.

Verses six through twelve give us insight into what this creature called a compassionate father is supposed to be like, however. Elsewhere we learn God’s people are also the bride of his son, and the son does what he sees his father doing, hence all of this applies to husband-wife relationship, too.

  • The Compassionate Father does what is right himself and does not use his power to crush or heavily burden his wife and children. Rather he  seeks to brings justice to all persons who are being treated unfairly, including all the members of his own family as well as any others within his reach.
  • He is clear to his wife and children about how he will behave and, by implication, what he expects of them. We also know from the scriptures that God is consistent and does what he says he will do.
  • He shows mercy and forgiveness, is patient, does not easily anger, but has plenty of love and expresses it freely and consistently.
  • He is not constantly scolding and yelling at his wife and children, nor is he always angry at them.
  • Once a child has been restored from a wrong, he no longer holds the past failing against his child. Likewise, he does not factor his wife’s previous errors into his future decisions, it is never mentioned again, full trust is restored. He loves his wife and children just as much when they have failed and done wrong as he did when they had not and hence does not withhold his love as a punishment.

Our verse today then also tells us a healthy father sees when his  children are sorry for their misdoings or otherwise in distress and feels their pain and hurt in himself and is moved to reach out and comfort and restore the child. For those of you who can consider this a “duh” rather than an amazing revelation of scripture, god bless you, and pray for us whose fathers were not consistent, compassionate, or forgiving  in their responses to us, that the truth of God’s word would become real in our wounded hearts.

Most all of us can gulp and tremble at this standard. Father God’s example is also a good model for mothers, wives, and leaders in general, and we all fall short of God’s glory and perfection. Let us accept his offer of a clean slate and a fresh start ourselves and seek power from above to be more like him in our dealings with our neighbors and all those who might be in our care or charge.

One Father Always Gives Good Gifts

  • Posted on June 13, 2011 at 8:17 pm

“If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” (Luke 11:13)

Jesus asks us in the preceding verses which of us would deliberately give their child something harmful and poisonous when their child asks their parent to meet a basic need the child has to sustain life.

Sadly, in our day, we can imagine, if not understand, people who would deliberately and knowingly kill their own child. The fact still remains, all but the heartless sociopath and the selfish narcissist at least have a desire to care for and meet their child’s needs  and give them good things, even if they don’t know how, or if what they thought would be best for the child turns out to be tragically wrong. Most of us, last I checked, would sacrifice of ourselves and our own needs to provide for our children all we at least think they need and, often, to provide them better than what we had even.

Jesus assures us, if broken, imperfect human beings prone to selfishness usually have such a strong parenting instinct, we need not fear how our flawless, perfect Father in Heaven will respond to our requests. His love moves him much more. We can rest assured his love will give us the holy spirit to nourish our souls and make us all we can and were made to be, not to poison our hearts and kill us inside. So lets not be afraid to let him work on us and transform us to be more like him.

Lord, we are choosing to trust you today.  We are asking for whatever we need today. Give us please our daily bread from your holy spirit. Nourish us as you see fit. Raise us up to be the people you made us to be. Teach us to love others just a tiny bit more like you love them today. In Jesus’ name we pray, amen.

Bother God All You Please

  • Posted on April 8, 2011 at 4:21 pm

“For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life.” (Romans 5:10)

Sometimes we feel like we shouldn’t bother God so much, that he expects us to have gotten it by now and be able to handle it ourselves. This lie of course tricks us into doing things in our strength rather than God’s and failing to get the victory over our sin. Paul reminds us, in his letter to the Romans, that Christ laid down his life for us while we were his enemies, weak sinners, ungodly and without hope of doing any good work for ourselves, at least that will endure for all eternity.

Now, Paul reminds us, we have been justified by Christ’s blood and reconciled to His Father by his death. The image of the frustrated, angry, impatient Father is horribly inaccurate. We have been saved from his wrath. He loves  us, has adopted us, and made us his own. Now that we are his, he’ll do even more for us as he finishes the work he has began in us. Call on the name of the Lord. Ask in faith for what you have need. He knows and He will meet it, his time and his way, if we cling to him with open hearts and wait upon him.

Lord, forgive us for the times we’ve rushed ahead of you. We thank you for the work you have began in us and we are believing you will finish it. We open our hearts today, by your grace, may we be willing to change and be reconciled in word and deed to your own. May your life be revealed in us today. In Jesus’ name we pray, amen.

Dads & Handling Wolves in the Pulpit

  • Posted on October 10, 2008 at 4:27 pm

A married church leader is tempting one of my family members to have sex. My family member is innocent, doesn’t want to get involved, and is evading the situation. How can we confront this sinning member, how can we solve this effectively in a Christian way? Please guide us.
Thank you,
Myrah

Dear Myrah,

Your remedies and solutions will depend on the exact position of this person in the church and your organizational structure. For instance, if it’s the senior pastor, report him to the denominational authorizes or the church board, or whoever is responsible for disciplining/firing him. If there is no such structure, no higher authority you can appeal to, and no one this person is accountable to besides God, don’t walk, RUN from the church. Out of concern for others, you should warn the other members of the church and let it be known why you are leaving.

Otherwise, handle this according to the scriptures (see Mt 18:15-17). Assuming this is a young female her father (throughout this, insert husband if she’s married) should first confront the man in private and give him a holy telling off. Yes, Dad has every right to get in the face of someone threatening his family like this. You can be both loving and firm. Stand on the scripture and politely but firmly confront him.

The next step will be take one or two others with you. At this point (or sooner if the holy spirit leads) bring in the the church leadership, those in place above him, such as a senior pastor, elder, or board member. They may stick to the biblical structure and go with you to confront him again, or go right into whatever disciplinary structure they have in place.

Biblically, in the last step, it’s taken before the entire church and they’re ex-communicated if they still don’t repent (stripped of membership and office and treated as an unbeliever). But you’ll have to follow whatever procedures are in place at your church. If the remedy doesn’t lead to his dismissal or repentance, again, don’t walk, run from this church and warn your brethren, as I detailed earlier.

First and foremost is protecting the victim of this harassment. If Dad isn’t in the picture or isn’t able to fulfill his biblical role, Mom can step up, but it’s preferable to ask another male friend or relative who can be trusted to fulfill the father’s natural protector role. Do not go light on this guy. He’s most likely a wolf, not a sheep. If you have reason to believe you’re dealing with a sociopath, do not confront him, but go directly to church authority. A sociopath will not respond favorably and will take measures to ensure the leadership believes him rather than you if you tip him off that you’re on to him.

That said, your average wolf is a coward at heart and will back off when Dad gets in their face. Once they discover their target for dinner has someone keeping watch over them, they will typically prefer to move on to easier prey who don’t have fathers protecting them. Sorry, Mom, but predators usually don’t find you particularly scary. Dads with a backbone, however, they usually don’t want to mess with. All I’m saying is be firm and assertive, standing your ground on the word of God. With the Holy Spirit’s guidance, Dad can politely and lovingly tell this guy off without getting violent, screaming, etc. This is not a time for meek and mild. This calls for strength. The Lamb of God we emulate is also the Lion of Judah. So long as Dad goes in under prayer covering, having sought God’s guidance and leading, Dad should be fine.

Again, if Dad’s not available, Grandpa, big brother, Uncle, Pastor, close family friend/spiritual father can be effective as well, especially if he’s committed to being involved in her life as a paternal substitute. As a last resort, Mom, go yourself in the power of the Holy Ghost and let Father God do the telling-to through you. This also goes for older sisters, aunts, and grandmothers if you happen to be the only person keeping watch over the lamb.

Note to Husbands: as I said in the parenthetical earlier, this all applies to you if the victim in question happens to be your wife. Your father-in-law handed the responsibility over to you when you said I do.

In Christ’s Love,
Andrea Graham

Laser & Sword Magazine–first e-issue free!

Double Jeopardy! (Part Two)

  • Posted on January 17, 2007 at 2:02 pm

 by Andrea J. Graham

As a result of a potent combination of the attack on fatherhood and disintegrating families that we discussed last time, many Americans, true believer and secularist alike, operate under their personal variant of one of two popular understandings of who the God of our fathers is.

The first views God as an inept namby-pamby who can be tricked and is quick to forgive—the sliver of truth all good lies have mixed in. Paul must not have known what he was talking about in Galatians 6:7-8, as the god we believe in would never think of allowing us to suffer the consequences of our actions.

This god also is not someone you can expect much help from when trouble inevitably does come, and even if he seen as such, he’s certainly not a god worthy of honor. Sure, we often show him lip service and shower him with praise. But the intent is, at least in part, to stroke his ego with empty platitudes in order to grease the palm that hands out blessings, the assumption being our god, like all fathers, is too stupid to know what we’re up to.

We don’t rely on his grace so much as his approval of anything we set our little hearts on, for he loves us far too much to deny us anything we desire. Or else he simply knows he created us with enough sense to figure out what’s best for ourselves. He respects our boundaries and majority rule and wouldn’t dare to butt in on matters that don’t concern him, such as how we conduct our lives outside the confines of the church walls.

On the other hand, many of us struggle under the idea that God is a cruel tyrant, able, but unwilling to help us, for he in his righteousness is angry with us at any hint of wickedness, real or imagined. We may try, but we never quite feel like we have pleased him and sense we are unable to please him, imaging God is not fully aware we’re frail fallen creatures made of dust and incapable of attaining, at least on our own, the degree of purity that the citizens of Heaven must possess in order for Heaven to remain Heaven.

No, this god expects us to obtain perfection in our own strength, without any help from him, and grows wroth at always having to bail us out and is infuriated that we can’t stand on our own two feet and fall flat on our rumps every time we try. True, we often cling to the hope Christ can make intercession for us, yet we still live under a cloud of fear, just “knowing” one false step, and we’ll be struck by the proverbial thunderbolt this god evidently borrowed from Zeus.

Nothing but absolute perfection can please this god—and it’s true that no mortal can stand before the Lord of Hosts on our own merits and live, but this god, if we’re honest with ourselves, actually despises us, wishes Christ never went and paid the penalty issued against us, and is looking for an excuse to go back on his promise and cast us into Hell. In the meanwhile, he seeks every opportunity to bring pain and suffering into our lives for no other reason than his own sadistic pleasure.

We don’t pray to this god, because he won’t answer. We don’t expect or seek blessings from this god, because he won’t give them–unless we manage to twist his arm with enough good deeds, and then only so those points won’t go towards the “entrance fee” apparently not covered by the blood of Jesus Christ. The last thing we expect is this god to keep any of the promises in the bible, as he only made those promises so he could take them away from us as punishment, or they’re only for select favored people, which usually doesn’t include us.

If we’re fortunate, this god has gotten so mad, he’s walked off entirely, abandoning us to follow the natural laws that govern the universe or be swallowed up.

And a miracle? Forget it. This god isn’t in the miracle business anymore. And don’t expect anything to ever change—not for the better, anyway. You’ll just get more of the same old same old, though that’s the only way he’s reliable.

Indeed, it’s this god’s will we stand by and let the world get worse and worse, as he’s looking forward to the events of in John’s Revelation and getting to bathe a world he’s eager to condemn (see John 3:17) in his holy wrath. Of course, he’d turn around punish us for doing his will that we allow evil to reign if Christ would let him (see Phil 2:7-8 ;) , but I’m sure you know what Christ is expected to make him do instead (see John 15:10)—for those that are good enough, anyway. The worst of us will have to get our acts together just in time to become martyrs or else. The revelation isn’t about a final push to draw people to him, no, it’s all about getting back at those dirty rotten sinners, one last hurrah before Christ will force him (see 1 Cor 15:28) to lay aside vengeance and blood shedding and punishing and oh yeah, the thunderbolt, too.

It goes without saying, among believers, most of us who think this way certainly love Jesus with all our hearts, but we’d just rather avoid His father if we at all can. If we’re totally honest with ourselves, we wouldn’t want to be in the same Heaven as him, either, if the alternative wasn’t Hell. Don’t ask us to explain the trinity, though. We’ll get a convenient headache. < good natured ribbing> Of course, some of us have dumped God the Father for Jesus the Father, Jesus the Son, and Jesus the Holy Spirit.

Some of us, though, flicker between the two opinions, unstable, wanting to believe in the namby-pamby god, but secretly afraid God’s really the tyrant and not about to have anything to do with him if he is—and in all our back and forth, never arriving at the truth.

The devil doesn’t care which lie we believe in, as neither is a god we can trust, a god we can respect, a god we can even truly love. We’re much too filled with fear of the tyrant, and too busy taking advantage of the namby-pamby while keeping the Jesus Heaven Insurance Card in our back pockets. We’re certainly too busy trusting in our phony get-out-of-hell-free card (the one that promises we can sin all we want and get into Heaven) to place our trust in the true saving grace of the Perfect Father, who saw a world filled with broken people enslaved to sin and incapable of doing anything pleasing to Him, who willingly sacrificed His only begotten Son on our behalf, to free us not only from the penalty of sin, but ultimately from sin itself, who when we acknowledge our wrong and submit to His authority, will come sweeping into our lives and day by day remake us into His holy image, so long as we allow His Spirit to work in us, and will continue this work in us until the day we are ushered into Christ’s Kingdom. (Phil 1:6)

And a Perfect Father who means what he says and does what he says He’ll do, every time, all the time, just on time, without second thoughts or reluctance born of remorse? For many of us who profess the name of Christ, that’s simply unbelievable.

In truth, God is far more just and righteous than the tyrant, and his love and forgiveness render the namby-pamby’s an obscene mockery, but in separating God’s justice/righteousness from God’s love/forgiveness, and vice versa, both are rendered lies.

Behind all the lies, is that crafty old serpent, waging a war on fatherhood and the proper role of men, not merely to attack and decimate the family, or even the culture and civilization, but to strike out against and slander the Perfect Father Himself.

 

Knowing the devil is striking out at us ultimately to hurt our Eternal Father, protecting ourselves from this attack will bring the brethren to a place where we have to start making what for many will be some tough counter-cultural choices. And being far more careful of the media we expose ourselves and our children to is only the beginning, but the rest God must reveal to you. He may call you to step out into some form of activism (political or otherwise), to educate on these matters within your local church body, to make a difference in your own community and model the love of the Father for a child who does not have a godly father in their life. You may even be called to create media that truly honors the Lord and a biblical world view.

 

Trackposted to Rightwing Guy, Outside the Beltway, Perri Nelson’s Website, Is It Just Me?, The Random Yak, The HILL Chronicles, stikNstein… has no mercy, basil’s blog, Blue Star Chronicles, and Stuck On Stupid, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.

Double Jeopardy! (Part One)

  • Posted on January 16, 2007 at 1:14 pm

 Normally, in this column, you write your letters, I pray, and then I answer the question. Today and tomorrow, we’re going to play Jeopardy. In other words, I pray, I write the answer, you ask google a question, and stumble on my site (or happen to read it regularly as the case may be, and thank you if you do!)

In the past forty or so years, the traditional role of the father has been all but destroyed in our culture. In a relatively short time, we’ve gone from producing shows like Father Knows Best and model families like the Cleavers to the Brady’s to shows like Step by Step (a ‘90s remake of the later that I once followed faithfully for the record) to Ellen, Friends, the Simpsons, King of the Hill, and their successors.

With few exceptions, such as the occasional bastion of decidedly unbiblical wisdom, fathers, and men in general, are overwhelmingly portrayed as either inept, powerless, lazy, stupid, or a combination. Often, the father’s favorite past times are burping, substance abuse, hurting himself or someone else in the process of trying to fix something, and ogling, if not actually chasing after, other women. The unmarried men, for that matter, are typically either womanizers, or homosexual. Men are portrayed as powerless against the wiles of a seductive woman, thoughtless creatures captive to their sexual drives, and little more than relatively hairless apes.

For the most part in TV Land, fathers are primarily good for a few laughs and little more. Increasingly, the only demographic group that it’s open season on is the white married male—especially if he has religion.

But what are fathers not being portrayed as? Too often, as not someone to take a serious problem to, not someone you can depend or rely on, and certainly not someone respectable.

In another aspect of the culture, we are presented with a mere two options for what fatherhood should be—either the overly permissive, loving dad who gives his children everything they ask for and never would think of punishing them, or the overly demanding, impossible-to-please tyrant who seeks to control every aspect of your life and itches for an excuse to punish you.

In both options, the example of what fatherhood should be is God.

The truth is, where our human fathers are concerned, our experience fits with reasonable closeness to one of these two archetypes, and the other we witnessed in a friend’s family, on television, or both. And most of us easily confuse the Perfect with the Imperfect, remaking God into our image of what fatherhood is—a Frankenstein’s monster constructed of own father, any father figures we may have, plus culture, ie, the media, with the emphasis of the sources varying from individual to individual.

A father’s most important task on this earth is to do his best to point his children to their Heavenly father. A good father models Christ and points His children towards the Perfect father. A wicked father heedlessly follows the dictates of his own heart and defiles in his children’s minds their image of Father God, a wound that could take years to recover from. Some may never recover.

An unwise father allows the media to taint that image with it’s confused effeminizing and mocking contempt for fatherhood. While genuinely striving to follow Christ, this father will tend to abdicate his proper role in the family and fail to realize, as important as mothers are, his relationship with his children has huge ramifications for his children in how they relate to god.

The majority of Christians spend more time watching television and immersed in other secular media outlets than we do reading the bible, in prayer, in Church, or perusing media sources based upon a biblical worldview.

Considering this, it’s no wonder so many of us struggle with ideas about God that depart from the God of the bible. We’ll take a closer look at our false perceptions and who God really is tomorrow.

Trackposted to Rightwing Guy, Is It Just Me?, Perri Nelson's Website, The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns, Big Dog's Weblog, Adam's Blog, stikNstein... has no mercy, basil's blog, Pirate's Cove, The Pink Flamingo, Planck's Constant, Common Folk Using Common Sense, Dumb Ox News, and Right Voices, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.

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